Damn the Heat!

I'm feeling more lazy than usual today and I think that it largely in part to the sudden change in weather. I'M HOT! Beyond my physical features (I'm such a cocky bastard)...

I heard from an OLD "friend" today. That was very surprising. I wonder what stars aligned in the clouds to make him decide to contact me?

Ah well, workout went well. My clothes were drenched more than usual & I can't remember feeling as grateful for a shower in my life.

Would you accept a bribe for your silence?

Karma is a heartless bitch.

Is it possible to be in love with more than one person at once?

The workout went well. I'm still completely winded and pushing myself beyond anything I thought I had in me just to keep up. My muscles ache less. I've never loved my bed as much as I do now...

Day #3

Why do I feel like I'm counting the days I'm being held as a POW? Hahaha...

I'll have to stop with the counting until we get to milestones! Anyway, today was actually quite awesome. I had the second round of interviews & someone made me an offer too good to refuse. You get what you wish for I guess & I'm looking forward to beginning the successful career I've been wishing for (and working my ass off for). My arms are almost back to normal. My abs are a lot stonger than I'd ever given them credit for. I guess there's a lot of muscle under all those soft fluffy fat cells after all...

Measurements to come soon!

Another day... #2 to be exact...

I didn't think it was possible for my body to ache as much as it does without suffering from some sort of illness, but... I've been proven wrong. Pray for me people...

A new beginning, beginning anew? All the same...

Much to share, much to discuss. I'm so easily excited and just as easily disappointed especially when it comes to the high expectations I impose on myself. Stay tuned for the video diary...

I seem to be the only one enjoying this wonderful weather we've been experiencing in NYC.
Just a thought...
I originally created this blog as a way to vent frustrations & relieve my psyche of troubles, but lately I find myself hesitating. I hesitate because I am no longer an anonymous blogger. I'll have to become crafty at disguising the names of the guilty & protecting the identity of the innocent because I refuse to censor myself & my thoughts because of the fear of confrontation.

Here we go...
Love...

What the fuck is it? Why am I constantly hearing...you are wonderful, why are you single? Maybe I'm just not that wonderful! I admit, I have a few flaws...maybe more than a few...hahaha... But! Someone somewhere will love me just the way that I am AND the feeling will be mutual.

Dating...

What the fuck is that all about? I have no idea what it means to date someone. I mean, when does it go from dating to monogamous relationship? And do you really have to have that awkward "I really like you a lot" talk with the other person to establish this or does it happen with an unspoken nod? Please, somebody let me know because I need a clue, map, directions & the use of a lifeline!

I need to start working. I was enjoying this vacation sponsored by the wonderful State of New York, but I'm getting bored and antsy. I need to feel like I'm being a productive member of this society...

End rant.

Almost like Angina...

...I think that's how I'd describe emotional heartache. Today seemed like a usual uneventful Tuesday until a few minutes ago when I felt like a professional bodybuilder punched me in my chest.  That pain is nothing compared to the tormenting humiliation, anger & overwhelming sentiment of betrayal pulsing through my arteries.

Pardon me, I have to vomit...

Happy Memorial Day!

Mixed emotions.  Confusion dominates.  Closely followed by frustration.  I need to escape...

Lost

After several months of intense studying and stress I'm at a loss...

I have no motivation to go to my usual volunteer shift at the local Salvation Army site.  I feel mentally exhausted & emotionally drained.  Yesterday was the scariest day of my entire life.  I've never been nervous for a test...ever!  My nerves started to get the best of me earlier in the day, but with the coaching & motivation of one of my instructors I found the courage to do the damn thing.  The result, I'm one step closer to certification! :)

Today's agenda:

1. Gym
2. Replenish the kitty treat stock
3. Reestablish connections with friends & business associates
4. Get hair & nails done
5. Pick up Keila, Taylor & Sydney from school
6. Be the best aunt EVER!

Life is funny...

Today was an emotionally rough day.  Five years ago I'm sure at this point in the day I would have been an excellent candidate for a Cymbalta commercial.  Now, I'm proud of just how strong I am and how effective I have become at practicing the Four Agreements.

Tomorrow I am taking my state practical exam.  I don't feel nervous, but I'm sure tomorrow will be a totally different story! Wish me luck! :)

It has been a while...

...since my last post.  Almost a month I believe!  Wow, time flies with you're inundated with real responsibilities.  School has taken over my life!  I don't want to abandon this form of release though.  I just wanted you all to know that I'm still alive!  I am officially out of hibernation! :)

Bronx Speed Dating Excitement!

This new adventure has taken over my life momentarily so I apologize to anyone who cares enough to follow this blog regularly! *smooches* I promise I'll be back really soon! You can feel free to follow my Bronx Speed Dating blog at http://BronxSpeedDating.blogspot.com .  I'm listing my local events over there so I don't have men signing up to attend my events in hopes of hooking up with me or just getting a chance to see my cleavage in person! Hahaha... Sorry fellas, I'm taken & I actually dress in a conservative fashion! :)